Have you ever wondered why something took you by surprise that you should have known all along? That's how I felt when I recently came to the realization that I had experienced <strong>postpartum OCD</strong> after my babies were born.

We have all heard the tragic and scary stories of women with thoughts of harming their baby.  I never had a single thought of harming my baby, and knowing that some women do makes me grateful that I never had those thoughts.  I wonder if what happened to me is more common.  I had intruding thoughts, well not even thoughts really, more like visions.  Ok I know that sounds weird, I admit it does,   but there is no other way to explain it.  And not only does it sound weird, it was weird!   If you've had them then you know what I'm talking about.  I had never heard of such intrusive visions and I told no one that I had them.  Fortunately for me I didn't have them often.

Let's see if I can explain it better:

I would be walking past the corner of the kitchen counter with my baby in my arms and as I rounded the corner a vision of my baby's heading striking the counter would pop into my head.  The bizarre truth is that my baby's head wouldn't even be close to the counter when the unexpected vision would pop into my head.  So then every time I walked past a counter I would worry about his head hitting the counter.  It worked the same way for the corner of the wall.

Welcome to my inner thoughts:

Where the hell did that just come from?  What a random thing and bizarre thing to pop into my head!   Not once have any of my three babies

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